Recently I went to the bar for my one and only night to get hammered. It was a pretty good time and a friends birthday. I just recently met her but we clicked pretty quickly. She's actually the one that is coming along with me to Australia and I am so excited! Although we've been hanging out a lot lately.







At the end of the night when we got back to the cabin it just so happened that we forgot the keys inside of the cabin and the door was locked. So unfortunately I had the bright idea to rip out the screen and crawl in. I made my first attempt using Katie's earring, that definitely wasn't sharp enough so then I grabbed Amy's keys and made a nice tear and then pulled the screen out and Katie crawled through the window. It sucked in the morning because now we have to figure out how to fix the screen but it was really really funny when it happened.



I haven't been going out much lately and when I do go out I've been staying sober and it's been good. I need to save money and this is one way to do it. I can't handle spending so much money on booze when I need to save. It just feels like a big waste and this way I feel a lot better in the morning. And I get to help out my friends when they are too intoxicated.

It's like you smiled and shook my hand

Sorry that it’s been so long that I have written anything that’s worth reading. I feel like there’s been a lot going on lately but I haven’t had the energy to sit down and write it out. This may be lengthy, it may not be, there won’t be photos because I haven’t taken any. I’ll do a photo post soon. Starting on Saturday I work for 14 days straight. A few of those days will be one where I work 12 hours. I’m looking forward to this because it means I will be making a lot of money and I really need a lot of money, if I plan on spending the next 8 months on the other side of the world. Which I do. I want to learn to surf. I want to sky dive. I want to snorkel and maybe learn to scuba dive. I just want to live, I mean really live, not coast through life. I feel as if I’ve been doing a lot of that. During the winter I just fall into this routine, a very monotonous, simple routine. I go to work, I go to school, I hang out with friends. It’s all the same. I need a hobby. My crocheting hobby doesn’t count. I’m excited for this winter and for some change and for not seeing snow and for getting out of the city and doing something different. I’m also excited to see Xavier Rudd in his country. I really hope I get that opportunity, that would be absolutely amazing.

On a side note, there is canker worms EVERYWHERE and they really gross me out and I always feel like they are crawling on me and I mean they probably are but I want them to run their cycle and die, I don’t’ think I can handle this anymore. You have to learn to walk super stealth to avoid them. Today Hannah and I doubled on my bike, and I’m pretty sure she got several on her because I wasn’t careful. And there’s a lot of trees around.

Fathers day recently passed. I didn’t call my dad. I don’t even know how I feel about this. It really tore me up that day. It bothered me that I wasn’t doing it but then I knew that if I did it it would just be so fake. Or not necessarily fake just not as genuine as I feel it should be. I guess it’s just something that I will always battle with until I choose to fix it or forget about it.

I am missing people. I miss the people that I didn’t see all the time in the city, the people that would call every month or so and want to hang out. Calling isn’t doing the trick anymore. I know I probably won’t be back in the city for the rest of the summer either so this is making it a bit harder for me. I guess I should get used to this if I am planning on being gone for 8 months. I miss the people that I saw all the time, I missed Katie when she was gone for the weekend. And I see her all the time. You really don’t realize how much you appreciate someone until they’re gone. It’s quite a sad concept if you think about it. You should realize how much someone means to you when they are sitting right in front of you.

Listen to the song Free Money by Patti Smith. She’s a legend, and I am thankful that Will introduced me to her music. Also Love is a Battlefield by Pat Benetar because she’s also sweet. And on my 18th birthday I had some girls over and we were playing a drinking game and my friend Haley rocked a dance to that song. I will never ever forget that. It was solid. I drunk dialed her recently. Drunk dialed someone else to get her number and then went on to call her… and ask her about the dance. She didn’t remember doing it.

A Little Bit Of Riddim

Sorry for my lack of quality posts. And the fact that all I'm posting is music videos. I'll do some posts soon. I promise.

Just because I'm hurting, doesn't mean I'm hurt

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone

I am nearing my 100th post!! But still a few away. I'll let you know, we'll celebrate. 100 sure isn't very many but way more than I thought that I would ever keep up with. I really don't think anyone checks this anymore. My updates are getting farther and farther apart.
Yesterday, while sitting and drinking with Ashley's family (which I love) I was informed that 50% of manitobans will get H1N1. I haven't been following the news at all because well when you don't have TV, radio, or the internet, it's kind of difficult. I suppose I could go and buy the paper but I'd really rather not know the depressing news of the world. When I heard that statistic I immediately turned to Ashley and said that's like either you or I will get this damn flu, one in two. She was proud of me for my mad fraction skills. That's also kind of freaky. Good thing I pretty much live in isolation.
Hmm...what else can I tell you about. I went from laying on the beach to laying on a roof top pool. I love my life. I"ll post pictures when I take some. Life is pretty great I must say. Now that summer is here anyways. Although i do need a new bathing suit top asap because the one I have still covers nothing. It's rather unfortunate but I'm not doing much to change that.
Okay, sorry this is short and extremely random. Just checking in and killing some time. who knows with this regular internet access for two days maybe I'll post again tomorrow!

Filling in the blanks

Written on June 8, 2009
It’s a cold rainy day…shocking, I feel as though I live somewhere where the sun no longer shines and there’s nothing but mist and rain. Although I am not going to lie I do really like rain and I will probably take a walk down to the lake right away…as in now cause I need to take a minute before I write this blog as I usually do.


Okay I am back. And there are some pictures from my walk. This is what I get to see everyday. I feel pretty lucky. Every now and then it’s sunny and nice out though…although those days I am usually at work.
Things are good. I am having one of those days though where I don’t feel to happy, it might just be the weather. The walk helped. Walking in the rain is one of my favorite things to do and it did help cheer me up a little bit. When I dated Will that was something we did a lot, we would always walk in the rain…often even if we were sitting in his house watching a movie or something and thunderstorm would start we would run outside and let ourselves get totally drenched.

Moving on...

Last night we had the girls over from work and we made some sushi and a couple dips and salads and stuff. It was really good and fun and I thought that our cabin would be much too small but it wasn’t. Everyone fit just fine in the cabin which I was kind of surprised at and we made way too much food and we ate and laughed and then cleaned…and there’s leftovers and left over sushi isn’t really that great which is unfortunate, it would be really good if it was just as good as it is when it’s fresh.
Things are coming along smoothly for Austalia. Tomorrow we are going to be going to talk to a travel agent I think so hopefully that will help us out a bit and set a few things straight. Today I texted a friend of mine and told him I was going and he was surprised and sad. He told me I should come home early. I told him he need to get skype so we could have video calls. I am really going to miss a lot of people but am so excited to go because it’s going to be really fun. I am going with someone that I met a week ago which is nerve racking but exciting. We really clicked and she was looking to travel in the fall for the same amount of time that I want to so we decided it would be a good idea to go together. It seems like I have known her for a lot longer than I have, you know what you meet someone and you just feel like you have known them forever? I really like that feeling.

It’s weird to leave a place and have to be the one to put all the effort in keeping in touch. It’s actually something that really bothers me. Katie was always the kind of person who would put in equal effort but now that we live together that’s not really necessary. I haven’t really heard from anyone in the city since I left unless I call them or email them. It’s just kind of shitty. The other day carly called me from NB and it was so nice to talk to her. We talked for a good hour and a half before hanging up. It’s good to know that even though we have spend about a total of 24 hours together in the last year it’s always back to normal every time I see her. I was going to finally be able to spend some time with her when I was back in the city in September but now I won’t be back until May or whatever and then when I come back there will only be 3 months and it’ll be her wedding!!! I am so excited for that, it’s going to be so so great and I’m so happy for her.

Sorry my blogs are sparse. I haven’t been getting on the internet much lately, and haven’t been writing many from at home. I do miss blogging regularly though.

I'm Home

This man is really a phenomenal artist and listening to his music just makes me feel really great. Honestly, how could you feel bad listening to something to amazing. I wish that I was half as talented. There are some lyrics in this song that I am considering for my next tattoo. We will see if that happens though. Now that I have started to save my money for Australia I am just not sure what I will be getting done and when I will get it done.

Sweet Sweet Surrender

Written on June 2, 2009
Maybe putting away this blog thing is harder than I thought that it was going to be. There’s just a lot of stuff that has been going on in my mind and I find that writing about it does me well. Getting it out on paper or in this case my computer is doing wonders. Plus sometimes it’s a lot easier writing all these things out than talking about them over and over to a friend or someone close to you.

There’s been nothing substantial that’s really changed. I have come up with the perfect method to save enough money for a flight to aus. I am going to keep on putting my tip money into a plastic bag and write all over it “money for the best time of your life”. Then hopefully I won’t spend it. Well for sure I won’t spend it, because having the time of my life would be really really sweet.

My room mates are both leaving for the night tomorrow. There might be a really deep thought out insightful blog coming your way. When they leave it leaves me with plenty of time to think and analyze and thought process. Which I love doing every now and then but also sometimes try and stay away from.

Yesterday we hiked Gorge Creek. It was absolutely beautiful and extremely exhausting. My friend Colin and I might hike it again on Sunday. That would be pretty sweet if we did, it provides a good kick in the ass I must say. I felt like I was going to die last night. Today wasn’t bad though, I wasn’t sore and when I woke up I went on a 15 km bike ride so that’s not too bad.

The girls are going to the bar tonight. I am going to I guess, although not drinking so I’m not really sure how good of a time that it will be. I hope it’ll be a good one. See what happens. I might wind up bailing out. You know how I do that sometimes. A good blog is going to come at you soon. In the next day or two. I got something brewing I just have to figure out how to put it all into words. I think tomorrow night I will go and chill out at the lake and journal it out. Then when I get back I’ll put it on the computer.

Some recent Photos

Strath and her sweet ass ride Gertie

Our Pet squirrel Phil

Proof that I was on the hike too...because I was behind the camera

Ash and I looking at something truly amazing. We are posing experts

The trail that we were on.

The girls looking down the incredibly steep hill

The Absolutely gorgeous view

Flashing Lights

It is starting to feel strange sitting in front of this computer and trying to put my thoughts into words. My journal is quickly becoming filled because I can go down to the lake and sit and just write for hours. This stuff in my journal is a lot more personal and I’ve been feeling rather insightful lately. Both insightful and lonely as both of my room mates haven’t been around, so I have been doing my best to fill my time with things other than sitting in the cabin. I know that I am pretty much an open book when it comes to my thoughts and my feelings but believe it or not there’s things that I hide.

Life is going along just as I like. I was able to go into Winnipeg for the weekend last weekend and see a bunch of people. It was nice to be there, felt familiar and felt like home. But then coming back to the lake also feels like home. I texted Ash as I was on the bus going to Winnipeg that it was really strange to feel like home is two different places. I guess maybe it’s always like that for some people because the house they grew up in would be home and then wherever they live. I don’t have the house that I lived in as a child anymore. Granted, we did live in 8 different houses so which one would I really consider my “childhood home”.

All of my dreams last night were horrible. I was crying in every single one. And I woke up a lot throughout the night and couldn’t sleep very well. And my eyes were always wet when I woke up. I don’t really remember all of them. In one of them I was humiliated beyond anything I could ever imagine but I don’t remember by who or what they did to me but I was crying and in another one my mom told me she never wanted to speak to me for the rest of my life.

I bought some of this yj juice from a girl I work with. It’s a vitamin supplement of sorts. Seeing as I have been throwing up everytime I take my vitamins in pill form I am hoping that this will stay down and do some damn beneficial stuff for my body. It comes from BC which is pretty awesome because it’s Canadian and it doesn’t taste too bad either. It’s also said to speed up your metabolism. I sure hope that’s true. The one day that I did take it I did notice an increase in energy. When I got home from work I went on a 12 km bike ride right away. I didn’t need to have my usual afternoon nap. We will see if it makes a difference in the long run or if it was all in my head.

I don’t know how often I will blog in the summer. It just seems that sitting here and writing these is taking a little more thought that I am willing to put forth right now. I mean I know that these are pretty pointless and all but I don’t like sitting here and having to write this all out. I want to be outside enjoying the air and not feeling like writing these little entries. I think I will just slow it down. Write when I feel like it and post when I have something to post. I hope you will still read and that when I am back to my real life in September you will continue reading because I do really love blogging and I will most definitely continue, and I will post this summer for sure. It just won’t be as often as I may have led you to believe. I have just realized that now that it is getting to be nicer outside I have spent a lot less time inside and a lot more time outside biking, walking, being by the lake, working.